I’ve decided to join NaBloPoMo, National Blog Posting Month to assist in the movement of making this blog a thing I use regularly.

NaBloPoMo has a monthly theme, and this month is Pressure. What a great way to start!

Let’s talk about the pressure I excert on myself to write everyday and how I struggled with writers block for so long, shall we?

Last November I was set to be a three time winner of NaNoWriMo. The month started off well enough. But then by about week two I fell off the wagon. I was swept up in work, but more so than anything I realized that I was forcing myself to write instead of being inspired to write. The words that tumbled out of me were just terrible. I mean, really…!

So, I realized I needed a break. I just stopped writing altogether. I played Assassins Creed 4, I ate food, I slept, I worked.

And then the tragedy of Olivia occurred and I was swept away in grief. And I spent time wading through those emotions.

One night, when I couldn’t sleep I started writing. I was writing about her, what if felt like to lose her from my perspective. That work took three weeks to finish and blew up Brautigan’s Girl yesterday when I posted it. It broke my record of most views and it was seen in over 30 countries around the world. All I had to do was post it and send a link to facebook and twitter. Olivia and Owen took it from there. If you missed it, you can read it by clicking here.

And suddenly there was no more pressure to write something great. I don’t need to spend hours agonizing over what words to use, or if I need a comma or a semicolon to make the sentence truly incredible. I just need to write from the heart. That’s what makes writing worth doing. And that was what took a simple memorial to Olivia and Owen from a decent post to a great post. I left my heart in those words. I told you the raw emotions of the experience. And you felt me, Gentle Reader. You felt it with me, maybe you cried with me. Maybe you shared it with a friend! You made that possible.

And most importantly, you relieved a great deal of pressure from me. I don’t need to have a schedule to this blog. I don’t need to have specific things I post about each day of the week. I just need to write from the heart. I need to share with you the highs and the lows of life.

And just when I was feeling good about not posting every day, I joined NaBloPoMo. Pressure is on now.

This post has been submitted to January 2014 NaBloPoMo. NaBloPoMo is a month-long challenge to post once a day on your blog, hosted by Blogher. Each month has its own theme. January’s theme is “pressure.”